Hare Krishnas Purchase Nevada Brothel

July 15, 2002
Las Vegas, NV

The International Society for Krishna Consciousness (AKA the Hare Krishna movement) has just purchased a failing house of ill repute eighty miles south of Las Vegas, The Sinderella Palace. There has already been a schism between the acquired employees and the new management over dress codes.

The Krishnas expect the ladies to greet guests at the door in traditional Indian saris instead of the usual Victoria's Secret and Fredricks of Hollywood attire they have invested much of their earnings on recently. They have been told that they have to purchase expensive saris with gold trim out of their own pockets and that this will liberate them from the cycle of birth, death and rebirth, on account of the proceeds going to the mission of their founder, Swami Prabhupada, whom they believe to be the incarnation of the Hindu god Vishnu.

Madame Cleo Torus told reporters, "The whole sari thing is not the worst part, its those Hare Krishna men who expect us to do all kinds of kinky things for money. Most of our girls are only into straight sex, and they deliver the goods in a professional manner. Of course they do give us extra tips not to tell their wives that they have been using our services, but that does not make up for their lack of personal hygiene. I heard they do not even use toilet paper most of the time. Ick!"